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Chapter 3

The Story The Authors

Dianne jolted awake. She was lying on the same beige and pink floral sheets and her alarm clock was screaming in the same annoying way. "Why can't it ever be real?" She moaned to herself as she pushed her alarm clock off the night stand, drug herself out of bed, and stumbled to the bathroom. Still in a sleepy daze, Dianne stretched for her toothbrush and glanced at the calendar on her wall. May 26th. Her eyes widened as she realized the signifigance of the day. It had been one month. It had been one month since she left the arrogant pig that she'd been with for more than two years. 30 days before, she had made the most drastic decision of her life, up to that point, and walked out the door. She'd promised herself that she'd be on her feet and a better person after a month. It had come and she was no where. Dianne stared at herself in the mirror. What could she do now? More depressed than ever, she started toward the shower, but stopped at the knock of her front door... Tatum3

It was the REAL Dianne who was really an angel!!! The other Dianne (the one who just had the dream) fainted. The angel Dianne carried the mortal Dianne out to the dump. Then the angel Dianne pushed a button. SQUISH went the trash compacter and the mortal Dianne (the one who had fainted) was dead. Then the angel Dianne went back to the mortal Dianne's house where Janice, Kristi, Joel, Terrence (who was a ghost NOT an angel), Jeremy, Patrick, and Vashondra de Luchinette were waiting. "Hey guys," said Kristi, "Joel and I've called a family meeting." Janice smiled. The two kids called lots of family meetings, usually about something silly like house hair or ferret bodies in the basement. She giggled, remembering the latter. Their house didn't really have a basement. Then she stopped giggling suddenly. Something in the kids' eyes told her this time it was serious. "You see," said Joel, "our lives are too safe for the lives of people in a story. We need more danger and excitement. "YOU CALL THAT SAFE????" screamed Jeremy, looking at twelve T. Rexes coming towards the house. "Yes I do," said Janice, ressing some buttons onher remote control. One of the T. rexes turned into a jellyfish. Another got stuck to the ground by a pool of superglue. The third died becase of a burning skittle that went through its heart. The fourth got speared by some Spice Girls in caveman outfits. The fifth turned its attention to a giant movie screen playing Titanic, tried to bite the captain, and got electrecuted. The sixth got chased away by a swarm of scorpions. The sevents got crushed by a mobile home. The eighth got sent to Siberia with a *POP!* The ninth tried to help the second but got stuck with it in the superglue. The tenth bit the third and the burning skittle burned through its heart too. The spice Girls dressed like cavemen skewered the eleventh because they'd eaten the fourth and it wasn't enough. The last T. rex ate the one that had turned into a jellyfish, but got poisoned. "You see?" sad Kristi, "In a real story we would've had to fight those dinosaurs with our bare hands. Just think of the adventure and excitement we would have if it weren't for that remote control! Worlds of danger! Excitement and suspense! Pitting our wits against superhuman monsters! It'd be the life! We'd have the time of our lives... but we can't. And all because of that stupid remote control." "Do you mean..." Janice's voice trailed off. This was unthinkable! "Yes, mom," said Joel, "you need to get rid of that remote control." "Well.... I NEVER!!!!" said Janice. She was at once furious, puzzled, and afraid. So she decided to Carolyn

It was the REAL Dianne who was really an angel!!! The other Dianne (the one who just had the dream) fainted. The angel Dianne carried the mortal Dianne out to the dump. Then the angel Dianne pushed a button. SQUISH went the trash compacter and the mortal Dianne (the one who had fainted) was dead. Then the angel Dianne went back to the mortal Dianne's house where Janice, Kristi, Joel, Terrence (who was a ghost NOT an angel), Jeremy, Patrick, and Vashondra de Luchinette were waiting. "Hey guys," said Kristi, "Joel and I've called a family meeting." Janice smiled. The two kids called lots of family meetings, usually about something silly like house hair or ferret bodies in the basement. She giggled, remembering the latter. Their house didn't really have a basement. Then she stopped giggling suddenly. Something in the kids' eyes told her this time it was serious. "You see," said Joel, "our lives are too safe for the lives of people in a story. We need more danger and excitement. "YOU CALL THAT SAFE????" screamed Jeremy, looking at twelve T. Rexes coming towards the house. "Yes I do," said Janice, ressing some buttons onher remote control. One of the T. rexes turned into a jellyfish. Another got stuck to the ground by a pool of superglue. The third died becase of a burning skittle that went through its heart. The fourth got speared by some Spice Girls in caveman outfits. The fifth turned its attention to a giant movie screen playing Titanic, tried to bite the captain, and got electrecuted. The sixth got chased away by a swarm of scorpions. The sevents got crushed by a mobile home. The eighth got sent to Siberia with a *POP!* The ninth tried to help the second but got stuck with it in the superglue. The tenth bit the third and the burning skittle burned through its heart too. The spice Girls dressed like cavemen skewered the eleventh because they'd eaten the fourth and it wasn't enough. The last T. rex ate the one that had turned into a jellyfish, but got poisoned. "You see?" sad Kristi, "In a real story we would've had to fight those dinosaurs with our bare hands. Just think of the adventure and excitement we would have if it weren't for that remote control! Worlds of danger! Excitement and suspense! Pitting our wits against superhuman monsters! It'd be the life! We'd have the time of our lives... but we can't. And all because of that stupid remote control." "Do you mean..." Janice's voice trailed off. This was unthinkable! "Yes, mom," said Joel, "you need to get rid of that remote control." "Well.... I NEVER!!!!" said Janice. She was at once furious, puzzled, and afraid. So she decided to Carolyn

The Story	The Authors
Dianne jolted awake. She was lying on the same beige and pink floral sheets and her alarm clock was screaming in the same annoying way. "Why can't it ever be real?" She moaned to herself as she pushed her alarm clock off the night stand, drug herself out of bed, and stumbled to the bathroom. Still in a sleepy daze, Dianne stretched for her toothbrush and glanced at the calendar on her wall. May 26th. Her eyes widened as she realized the signifigance of the day. It had been one month. It had been one month since she left the arrogant pig that she'd been with for more than two years. 30 days before, she had made the most drastic decision of her life, up to that point, and walked out the door. She'd promised herself that she'd be on her feet and a better person after a month. It had come and she was no where. Dianne stared at herself in the mirror. What could she do now? More depressed than ever, she started toward the shower, but stopped at the knock of her front door...	Tatum3
It was the REAL Dianne who was really an angel!!! The other Dianne (the one who just had the dream) fainted. The angel Dianne carried the mortal Dianne out to the dump. Then the angel Dianne pushed a button. SQUISH went the trash compacter and the mortal Dianne (the one who had fainted) was dead. Then the angel Dianne went back to the mortal Dianne's house where Janice, Kristi, Joel, Terrence (who was a ghost NOT an angel), Jeremy, Patrick, and Vashondra de Luchinette were waiting. "Hey guys," said Kristi, "Joel and I've called a family meeting." Janice smiled. The two kids called lots of family meetings, usually about something silly like house hair or ferret bodies in the basement. She giggled, remembering the latter. Their house didn't really have a basement. Then she stopped giggling suddenly. Something in the kids' eyes told her this time it was serious. "You see," said Joel, "our lives are too safe for the lives of people in a story. We need more danger and excitement. "YOU CALL THAT SAFE????" screamed Jeremy, looking at twelve T. Rexes coming towards the house. "Yes I do," said Janice, ressing some buttons onher remote control. One of the T. rexes turned into a jellyfish. Another got stuck to the ground by a pool of superglue. The third died becase of a burning skittle that went through its heart. The fourth got speared by some Spice Girls in caveman outfits. The fifth turned its attention to a giant movie screen playing Titanic, tried to bite the captain, and got electrecuted. The sixth got chased away by a swarm of scorpions. The sevents got crushed by a mobile home. The eighth got sent to Siberia with a POP! The ninth tried to help the second but got stuck with it in the superglue. The tenth bit the third and the burning skittle burned through its heart too. The spice Girls dressed like cavemen skewered the eleventh because they'd eaten the fourth and it wasn't enough. The last T. rex ate the one that had turned into a jellyfish, but got poisoned. "You see?" sad Kristi, "In a real story we would've had to fight those dinosaurs with our bare hands. Just think of the adventure and excitement we would have if it weren't for that remote control! Worlds of danger! Excitement and suspense! Pitting our wits against superhuman monsters! It'd be the life! We'd have the time of our lives... but we can't. And all because of that stupid remote control." "Do you mean..." Janice's voice trailed off. This was unthinkable! "Yes, mom," said Joel, "you need to get rid of that remote control." "Well.... I NEVER!!!!" said Janice. She was at once furious, puzzled, and afraid. So she decided to	Carolyn
It was the REAL Dianne who was really an angel!!! The other Dianne (the one who just had the dream) fainted. The angel Dianne carried the mortal Dianne out to the dump. Then the angel Dianne pushed a button. SQUISH went the trash compacter and the mortal Dianne (the one who had fainted) was dead. Then the angel Dianne went back to the mortal Dianne's house where Janice, Kristi, Joel, Terrence (who was a ghost NOT an angel), Jeremy, Patrick, and Vashondra de Luchinette were waiting. "Hey guys," said Kristi, "Joel and I've called a family meeting." Janice smiled. The two kids called lots of family meetings, usually about something silly like house hair or ferret bodies in the basement. She giggled, remembering the latter. Their house didn't really have a basement. Then she stopped giggling suddenly. Something in the kids' eyes told her this time it was serious. "You see," said Joel, "our lives are too safe for the lives of people in a story. We need more danger and excitement. "YOU CALL THAT SAFE????" screamed Jeremy, looking at twelve T. Rexes coming towards the house. "Yes I do," said Janice, ressing some buttons onher remote control. One of the T. rexes turned into a jellyfish. Another got stuck to the ground by a pool of superglue. The third died becase of a burning skittle that went through its heart. The fourth got speared by some Spice Girls in caveman outfits. The fifth turned its attention to a giant movie screen playing Titanic, tried to bite the captain, and got electrecuted. The sixth got chased away by a swarm of scorpions. The sevents got crushed by a mobile home. The eighth got sent to Siberia with a POP! The ninth tried to help the second but got stuck with it in the superglue. The tenth bit the third and the burning skittle burned through its heart too. The spice Girls dressed like cavemen skewered the eleventh because they'd eaten the fourth and it wasn't enough. The last T. rex ate the one that had turned into a jellyfish, but got poisoned. "You see?" sad Kristi, "In a real story we would've had to fight those dinosaurs with our bare hands. Just think of the adventure and excitement we would have if it weren't for that remote control! Worlds of danger! Excitement and suspense! Pitting our wits against superhuman monsters! It'd be the life! We'd have the time of our lives... but we can't. And all because of that stupid remote control." "Do you mean..." Janice's voice trailed off. This was unthinkable! "Yes, mom," said Joel, "you need to get rid of that remote control." "Well.... I NEVER!!!!" said Janice. She was at once furious, puzzled, and afraid. So she decided to	Carolyn

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