Bananas in Springtime

Bananas in Springtime

Chapter 6

     The Story The Authors
"Olaf?" asked Kristi. "Where did you come from?" "You doofus you should know!" asked Olaf. "Weren't you already on a mission to save Terrence from hell?" he continued. "Why couldn't you just go on with that without Janice?" "Er - well, you see Olaf, she was the reason we had to do that," said Joel. "None of the rest of us like him at all," continued Dianne. "So anyway what was your idea?" asked Patrick. "Well let's take a look at the remote control's buttons!" said Olaf. Everyone realized that the remote control lay on the florr. Ollaf piced it up and read the lables under the buttons: "Turn subject into jellyfish... lizard monster... burning skittle shower... superglue... Carrot Top... Spice Girls... Titanic.... Hey, those last three don't sound so bad!" "Any other buttons you moron?" asked Dianne. "Oh yes of course," said Ollaf. "Cyclones... acid rain... earthquake... swarm of scorpions... Howard Stern... send subject to Siberia. That's everything. Let's look in Siberia that's the only button that could make her disappear." So they went to siberia and there was Janice. Janice screamed abd grabbed the remote control. Then she took out a special key and unlocked a little door in the side of the remote control. It opened into a secret compartment with lots of little unlabeled buttons and a big dull pink one in the middle with palish letters on it that warned, DANGER DO NOT PUSH. Janice pushed several of the smaller unlabeled buttons and the button glowed bright red and the letteres glowed a blinding white. The whole thing started flashing. DANGER! DANGER! DANGER! DO NOT PUSH! DO NOT PUSH! DO NOT PUSH! Janice reached for the button snickering, "this ought to end your petty immortal lives forever!" Carolyn
"WHAT'S WITH THIS JANICE CRAP?" Now back to our story. "Scary. Baby. Ginger.Posh. Sporty. You stink." Mr. Relvile, the music manager, said to the spice girls. Baby pouted. "But my mammy is my best frind. She said I cauld du anethang!" Baby complained in her british accent. "And I need mare loveas!" Ginger frowned, thinking about all the poor hunks out there. "And I need a new hacut!" Scary crossed her arms over her chest. Sporty picked up a football. "Plase fire us." Sporty asked. Posh walked into the room naked. "Somebady stale my clathes!" Posh said angrily. "Holy shit! Mr. Relvile!" Posh sheilded herself with her hands. "No, no. I meant you need a bath. They stink. Both ways." Mr. Relvile pointed at Janice, Joeljeremy, Kristin, and Terrence, and Diane, and all the other shitty people that hang out with them tied together, hanging from a rope over a flame. Suddenly the rope broke and all the shitty characters went tumbling down into the fire. A large fire. "I can make you way bigger. Way bigger." Relvile smiled gayly. THREE HOURS LATER........................ "Okay that's it, go with the camera." Cameraman David pointed the camera at the naked spice girls. He put an up close on their breasts, each one of them. Suddenly the door slammed open. It was Janice. NOT! SHE WOULDN'T BE IN THIS STORY BECAUSE SHE'S A HOOSHER NEWBOB CHARACTER LIKE ALL THE OTHER HOOSHER NEWBOB CHARACTERS SHE HANGS OUT WITH! It wasn't Janice, it was the backstreet boys. Baby got up and started walking toward them. Remember, the spice girls are NAKED. "Hi Nicky." she whispered. She started stroking his face. Nicky picked her up and took her away. Scary got up. "Wannabe my lover, A.J.?" Scary jumped up and landed in his arms. "Take me away!" Scary was carried off. Sporty was flirting with Kevin. They walked away. Ginger was having sushi with B-rok in another room, and we won't give you the details, you nasty thing. Howie D.was kissing Posh. Posh signaled him to go to another room, so they could get DIRTY! Celine Dion walked in, in her underware. "Dirty Dancing, lover. Yeah yeah." Celine was singing. She was dancing DIRTY with David, the camera man. Relvile was jumping up and down when he saw Madonna come in naked. Ginger got back with B-rok, both naked, and they really got dancing. The rest of the spice girls came in with their lovers. Paula Cole came in naked, hairy armpits and all. Elton John was swinging "singing" around with the naked En Vogue fighting over him. Even the ghost of Princess Diana was swinging, singing, and all naked at the party. Stay tuned for part 2. The ghost of Sante ROO


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