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Chapter 6

     The Story The Authors
She said, "Who Cares?" out loud, walked home and had a cookie. Frampton
After eating the delicious cookie she decided to go to bed, because this was a tuesday and she had to work the following day at Trippso's. Trippsos was a belly dancing place which she used to frequently visit before being employed as a spitoon empitier. This was her first days work and she was very excited JAZ
She danced sexily out onto the stage. Every man was hers. She started to slowly flexing her pelvic muscles and gave a look that every man in the room could feel in their hip pockets. She was so into her dancing she hardly noticed the man in black enter the club. She was so into being sexy she didn't see him whip out the semi-automatic. She was so into her groove she didn't feel the bullets that ripped into her and the rest of the patrons in the club. Hot metal ripped through the room. The shooting stopped only when the gun ran out of ammo. The man in black quickly reloaded his weapon and kick in the door to the back room. There sat a corpulous man in a dingy white suit and three bodyguards. The man in black deftly took care of the bodyguards, a shot between the eyes of one, a quick chop to the neck with his hand followed by a bullet to the gut, and finnaly a quick spray of bullets everywhere to the third. The man in black shot the fat man in his left shoulder. The fat man cried in pain. The man in black finally broke his stony violence. "Where's Jason?", he asked the fat man. "I-I-I don't know.", stammered the fat man. The man in black shrugged his shoulders and shot the fat man in the chest. The man in black left the room as a growing stain of crimson grew on his dingy white suit. X
The man in black stepped outside and the sunlight nearly blinded him. He slipped on his black ray-ban sunglasses and started down the street. Occasionally he would stop an unsuspecting passer-by and ask "Where's Jason?" The poor stangers would shrug or ask "who?" or say "I don't know" and then the darkly clad man would shoot them in the chest. After the man had killed a half a dozen people, he found Jason at a newstand reading a Rolling Stone. "Are you gonna buy that?" the newstand owner growled. "Nope." Jason said nonchalantly. "This ain't no stinkin' library, mister!" the old man reached for the magazine but was shot dead by Jason's colorlessly dressed friend. Jason dropped the magazine on the corpse that lay at his feet and invited his friend up to his apartment to see his new pet. He had found a cat near death on the road. It was the most unusual cat he'd ever seen. She was long and sleek with intelligent looking eyes and her fur was strawberry blonde. The tag that hung from her hot pink, rhinestone studded color was engraved with the name Vashondra. Sandy
The man in black leaned closer to inspect the cat. Persian. At one time she was well fed. He assumed the cat was female because what self-respecting male tom would have straberry-blonde fur? No real male cat, that's for sure. "Where do ya figure she's from?" Jason asked as he shoved his apartment keys into his jeans pocket. After a moment of silence, the man in black shrugged. "I dunno." Jason paused for a moment. "Say, can I see your gun for a bit?" The man in black handed over his pistol, it gleamed menacingly in the 60-watt glow of the apartment. Jason checked the chambers and cocked the gun. "I dunno..." he mimicked and shot the man in black in the chest. Elwood T. Leary
The bullet pierced through the sternum and severed the right artery andremained lodged there. Jason then.... none
Jason (who was going home to commit siucide) left poor Vashondra the pink cat out in the rain. Vashondra had not always been a cat. Once, she had been the famous sidekick with the 3 foot high strawberry blonde hair do with all her stuff in it. Then she and her four friends (the famous Fictional Five) had been turned into cats. Vashondra had escaped but Bitzy, Dianne the angel, Janice, and Kristi (her four friends)had been killed on purpouse by a steam roller. Ugh. The gruesome scene was still vivid to vashondra. Suddenly, Janice, Kristi, Dianne the angel, and Bizy popped up out of nowhere. "You silly you forgot we were immortal!" screamed Kristi. Vashondra giggled embarassedly. "Well," she said, "now that that's over could you turn me back into a human like you are agian? I'm getting sick of this damn wet fur coat." Carolyn
"We'd love to," Janice began, "but the trick is you have to get run over by a steamroller first." "Ohmygawd!" mewed Vashondra. "Unfortunately, it's true." Kristi said. "Being run over by a steamroller killed the mortal cat bodies and then we were able to take our immortal human form again." she explained. Vashondra did not relish the thought of being run over by a steamroller, it would be so icky. But she neither did she want to remain a cat forever. "Isn't there a more glamorous way to go?" asked Vashondra. "You could get into a car accident." suggested Dianne, who was the only one who could understand Vashondra's cat talk. After much discussion, the fabulous fictional five decided that the most glamorous yet painless way to kill Vashondra's mortal cat body would be a drug overdose. But they didn't know where to get any drugs so without Vashondra's knowing it, they picked her up and threw her into traffic where she was run over and killed. Sandy
And soon everyone gathered to celebrate the demise of the one known as Vashondra. "Good riddance!" someone said. "I couldn't stand her. And that odor!! Damn, you could smell her a mile away!" Someone cranked up some dance tunes on a portable player and soon everyone was dancing in the streets. Someone threw beer and hard liquor out of a second story window resulting in everyone getting inebriated in one way or another. Janice was burned in effigy. Another tried to flush the spirit of Dianne down a public urinal, but the spirit was relentless in its struggle to resist the vortex of water and human waste, and was soon stuck halfway down the plumbing system. An extremely drunken lunatic snatched the corpse of Vashondra and began to dine on it like a savage. "Kitty litter a la carte!" he would say in-between chews and swallows. antithesis
The End
May 1998